Historically, engagement rings in most western societies have been the sole purview of a newly engaged young woman. Since the late 1800s, a future groom has been expected to spend a good amount of his salary to secure a ring which he then presented to his future bride when he first proposes marriage. Since the mid 1930s, this ring has also typically included the largest diamond the groom could afford and this diamond was supposed to provide the woman the financial security she needed in case the man broke off the engagement and 'ruined' the woman's reputation.
It's probably fair to say our society has changed a fair amount since then. In a world where many women are increasingly catching up with (and in some cases passing) men as full equals in society (well, except at the very top of society), it only seemed fitting that Julia and I decided to challenge some of the conventions that underpinned this very dated tradition. So in this spirit of a new day, we decided that in addition to Julia receiving her own engagement ring and wedding band, I too would also be receiving both an engagement ring and wedding band as well.
While it seemed a bit strange at first, I have to say, I am increasingly feeling very good about the decision we have made. While I have never really been a guy who had much use for jewelry other than a watch, the two ring scenario definitely offers a unique set of benefits. First, not only will I have the flexibility of wearing two different rings at any given time, but I will also have the ability to mix and match rings based on the circumstances at hand. For instance, if I were to get a titanium engagement ring and a more traditional wedding band, I will always have the ability to wear at least some ring no matter if am doing work around the house or going to a reception at the White House.
But while this is a really nice perk to have, the most important reason why I really like this arrangement is because of the symbolism that it represents. We will never have a truly equal society until we really take a step back and challenge many of the traditional conventions which underpin much of the historical subjugation of one sex to another and while it may only be a tiny step in the big picture of things, we feel it is a step that makes sense for us and hopefully is one that makes sense to you as well.
Thanks for visiting our new website! We're just getting started, but we'll be posting regularly as Matt and I start to plan our wedding and honeymoon. Check back for updates on venues, dates, other weekend activities, photos, and more.
We especially encourage everyone to comment below. We're looking for wedding suggestions and advice, jokes (good ones), and any other feedback you have.